Reason #3253234 Why I Hate Doing Business With Huge Corporations

So I call up our mortgagee for a question about our property tax escrow account, and before she even asks me if I have any more questions, she launches into something I would hang up on in disgust if it were a telemarketer’s call.

I’m looking at your account, and I see that you are eligible for a home equity loan through our affiliate, [Laser Loans], and a preferred interest rate. You can use that loan for consolidating debt, perhaps home improvement, or perhaps if you have children about to enter college, paying for their tuition. Would you like me to transfer you over to our loan department to talk with somebody who could tell you what options you have available?

Are you serious? Did I just get an ad read to me over the phone when I’m calling for customer service?! If I was interested in your loans, I would have called your loan department. Stop trying to market to me when I’m calling about something totally unrelated.

To the marketing genius who came up with this: I’m sure you have all sorts of research as to how such a pitch generates n% sales in loans, and that you’re sure there is all sorts of “synergy” and excitement and whatever marketing bull you came up with. Do you want to know the truth? Treating your customer service calls as a marketing opportunity is a surefire way to piss off your customers. You’ve just wasted my time, and my opinion of your company is that you’re a bunch slimy assholes, despite the fact the lady on the phone was quite polite and really had no say in the matter. Nice job.