Most Effective Alarm Clock in the World

Having trouble waking up in the morning? Do you have difficulty rousing yourself from slumber? Can you not hear your alarm? Would you like to pop out of bed as soon as it goes off?

If you answered “Yes” to any of these questions, you might consider checking out the All-New Jack Hammer Alarm Clock! Guaranteed to leave you wanting for sleep!

And since the D.C. legal code forbids it, you can be guaranteed it won’t go off before seven o’clock in the morning! Unfortunately, changing the time requires passing a law with the city council.